Crazy Monkey Genius Kulot

If you’ve been following my entries here you probably have a good idea how insane Kulot, my youngest sister, really is. I thought it will be good to share her neurotic wisdom here all in the name of a good laugh since it has been wet and soggy for some days now, maybe everyone can use a bit of sunshine from her. I’ve come up with a short list of some of her most famous quotes.

1. “Dito na lang ako magstay. May Disney channel dito eh [I’ll stay here because of the Disney channel].” -Kulot said this when I was at the hospital. She came from school and when she saw that the cable on my room had Disney, she did not want to go home anymore.

2. “Ano ba yan 80 lbs. lang ako. Yung kalahati pa nun bigat lang nung tape worm sa tiyan ko [Tsk, I’m only 80 lbs. With half of that 80 lbs. accounting for the tape worm inside my intestines].”

3. “Alam mo ba Sanse kung bakit hindi totoo and mga superhero? Kasi mahirap yun eh, kung totoo ang superhero eh di pag nagalit yun sumabog na ang bulkan o kaya lumindol na. Pag may laser eyes ka nasunog na yung tiningnan mo pag uminit ulo mo, kaya imposible yun [Do you know sister why superheroes are not real? Because that’s hard, see if they are real, when they get mad they can accidentally cause volcanic eruptions, or earthquakes. If you have laser eyes, you’ll burn the person you instantly get mad at, so that’s impossible].” -Kulot said this out of the blue. She and my other sister were just sitting together, not even talking when Kulot suddenly halted the silence with this statement, which she was very seriously pondering on.

4. “Mommy, kung lahat ba ng tao sa mundo walang ilong at ako lang ang meron, ako ba ay abnormal? [Mommy, if all the people in the world did not have noses and I did, does that mean I am abnormal?]”

5. “Sanse, tulungan mo nga ako magdrawing ng tupa. Kasi pag nagdrawing ka ng tupa nakakainspire! [Sister, help me draw sheep because really, drawing sheep is really inspiring!] -Kulot was doing her homework this time but was having trouble doing an illustration of a sheep so to convince my other sister to help her, this was what she said.

6. “Naalala mo pa ba ditse yung mga panloloko mo sakin nung bata pa ko? Ang sabi mo may mini-town sa tiyan ko. Pag kumakain ako sinasalo nila yung mga kinakain ko tapos yun ang pagkain nila! [Sister do you remember the lies you told me when I was little? You said there was a mini-town inside my stomach that when I eat they catch the pieces of the food inside my tummy and that is what they also eat!]

7. “Hay nako, napagod na yata sa kakaiyak [At last, looks like she got tired of crying already]. -Kulot made this remark last summer when I was crying all morning in our room and she was just scowling and watching me mope. All my drama must’ve tired her she fell asleep, but I woke her not long after and that was what she told me, maybe annoyed that I disturbed her.

8. “Oo, babantayan ko yang pusa mo. Tingnan mo na lang mamaya ha? Nakasabit yan dyan sa labas sa puno [Sure I’ll watch your cat. Look for it later outside by the tree okay? It’s hanged.]


7 thoughts on “Crazy Monkey Genius Kulot

  1. Pingback: The Meditations of Crazy Monkey Genius Don Domeng « Prinsesa’s Anatomy

  2. hahaha our sister really is a genius! hahaha plus, she’s more of like the sweetest monster you’ll ever see in your life!=) hahaha

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